Mar
31
2011
Your Choices Deserve Careful Consideration
Choices=Opportunities. Every since you leapt out of bed with joy and enthusiasm to greet this precious gift of a new day, you have made a host of choices that you now call habits: what toothpaste to use, what outfit to sport, and what coffee to slurp. Your life is a reflection of the choices that you have made.
Granted, we can’t control everything but we can control our response and our perception of events as they unfold. Look around you, look within – Do you like what you see? Who are those people around you? Every minute, day, month, and year, you make choices about what to say, do, think. Considering the insane amount of possibilities for every little thing can quickly become overwhelming and thus, filtering through and flipping on autopilot has its place.
Yet, if that overall sense of comfort leads to complacency, frustration, apathy, and perhaps dis-ease, time to pull aside the pilot, check credentials, and review the flight plan.
- Is it heading to YOUR dream destination?
- How much of your life is dictated by expectations, judgments, and opinions of others that have now become your own? Many prefer to follow some random path and complain rather than step up and start digging.
- Remember when you were a kid and getting dirty was fun? Bring on the mud!
Challenge your choices and explore other ways of thinking, doing, speaking, and being. Try this exercise if you are in desperate need of perspective and enlightenment:
- Step outside yourself and listen and observe YOU for a few days.
- Then ask: What path is this kind and caring soul on?
- Is there a (destination) POINT?
- What questions would you pose to your friend?
- What advice might you offer?
Making new choices requires strength, persistence and patience. That path most likely will not be clearly marked and you can expect your share of potholes, detours, and delays. However, the sense of purpose and pride will put a spring in your step and launch you into a whole new world. Expect others (and yourself) to question and challenge your choices. Stay strong – you’re onto something.
Here’s a quote full of support and encouragement. “People are unreasonable, illogical and self-centered. Love them anyway. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Do “good” anyway. If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway.” – Robert Schuller.
It’s your choice. Make a few good ones today and your new habits will shine right through this season and throughout YOUR whole year!
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Mar
11
2011
First and foremost, for any and all in and/or associated with Japan, healing thoughts, prayers, and warmest aloha from your friends and relatives in Hawaii.
Second, I must say that it’s interesting and often enlightening in times like these to observe your own thoughts, words, and actions as well as those around you. You can learn (and feel) so much and perhaps it is the impetus, the instrument needed at just the right time to make a decision to change your life, move in a new direction, open wounds and dig in so that you can finally truly heal, embrace life, share, accept, slow down, take a leap of faith . . . love, really really love.
Heart to heart. Soul to soul.
Here’s my half story – Sort of a random stream of consciousness after a night vacillating between curiosity and deep, peaceful sleep.
I decided not to leave. I live right on the beach in Oahu. I had turned my phone off (which I never do) and gone to bed before overhearing a visitor next door on his cell phone outside my front door in anxious voice explain “There was an earthquake in Japan and we have a tsunami warning. Sirens are going off. We’re getting packed and planning to evacuate.” Shortly thereafter, my neighbor came to knock – it took him a few times to get my attention – and once he did, I told him in a sleepy daze, I wasn’t sure what I was going to do. Over the next few days I found out that pretty much my entire town evacuated upon the prompting of city officials and police parolling the neighborhoods. When I took a walk the next morning at around 6:30, I watched as a stream of cars loaded to the limit (and held back by closed roads) slowly and eerily made their way back home.
After closing the door and thinking “hmmm”, I put a few minutes into making a very short list and organizing a few things to throw into a backpack should I have felt compelled to depart within minutes of the expected hit. Incidentally, I didn’t turn my phone back on again until morning. As I started to put away the items this morning, I chuckled at what would have made the journey - and all that would have been left behind which isn’t much these days.
The basics – laptop, phone, credit cards, hat, pair of pants, fleece vest, surf shorts, bikini sat ready on the chair. I recall thinking that people might be kind of freaked out so music would be calming so I put my ipod and a tiny little portable speaker ball in the scant pile and as my friend later suggested “People will be fighting for water and food and you’re going all kumbaya and offering song and dance.” Indeed, it was true and felt good.
As I grabbed my contacts and a few toiletries, it crossed my mind that some folks might have forgotten toothpaste so I tossed in an extra tube. I set aside a few water bottles and at about 3:10am, I briefly entertained the idea of boiling up a bunch of eggs as those would be nice, easy to share, and healthy. Not sure what happened to that part of the program. I also had a notebook, camera, and iFlip ready to go to record this monumentus event.
I also thought it might be a good idea to be dressed if someone found me and also be able to swim around to check things out and help people should the situation arise soo I put on my bikini top, pajama bottoms (I figured I could switch to surf shorts pretty quickly and my pajama bottoms were much more comfy - amazing how clueless one can be when he/she is used to controlling the environment), and my San Francisco Giants tank top so if i were floating around without my id, someone would . . . uh what? think that I was a Giants Fan, that I used to live in SF, that it matched my trousers nicely?
Funny how the mind works. Truth is, I would have just wanted to see the wave (I’ve had 3 very real tsunami dreams and they were exhilarating to say the least) and be dead in the next breath. In hindsight, I was and probably will continue to be wildly unprepared for such a devastating event and haven’t the capacity to care – and I don’t say that in a negative or flippant way but more like a resolved calm and acceptance that I’ve had an incredibly blessed and amazing life – living, loving, exploring, expressing – and it is what it is. If it’s time to go, take me. I’ve no energy or interest in fighting.
I never felt any fear. I did walk to the beach at about 3am (half hour before tsunami was expected to land) and felt as I always do when I’m near or in the water – an incredible connection with the ocean and the energy of life. It was intense and indescribably beautiful. I felt (and still feel) tired. When I saw the devastation in Japan this morning and entire communities being washed away with the ease of hosing off the driveway, it was a different ocean – an angry, hurt, frustrated one. If that ocean would have graced our shores, I would have surrendered. Our powerful planet is crying out. I’d like to think I’m listening. Are you?
Tsunami – Thoughts & Prayers
Mar
9
2011
Dumbbell Kickbacks - Triceps
Dumbbell Kickbacks are an excellent exercise for your Triceps.
- Let’s get to work!
- 1. Start with a very light weight for this exercise. You might start without weight and look in the mirror to make sure you have correct form.
- 2. Lean over bench, keep your back flat and neck, legs, and torso relaxed.
- 3. Take the weight lightly in your hand. The upper part of your arm should be parallel alongside your back and the lower part of your arm will be parallel to your thigh.
- 4. Focus on squeezing your tricep muscle and extending your weighted hand up and back – keeping your upper arm stable.
- 5. Hold tight for a nice squeeze and slowly lower your hand back to starting position. Shoot for around 7-10 solid reps but stop as soon as you break form.
- 6. Switch to the other side and repeat. 3 sets each side
- Dumbbell Kickbacks – Triceps (End of Movement)
To modify this exercise and create your own Custom Home Workout:
- Simply use a chair instead of a bench
- Use light hand weights or create your own (filled plastic water bottles work well and you can add an extra hand squeeze as you extend your arm through the movement).
- Remember to be very careful of your form and double-check in a mirror if you can.
- Keep your body in position but relaxed and focus on extending and contracting your tricep muscle.
- Nice Work!!
Jan
28
2011
- One Arm Dumbbell Row (Back)
The one arm dumbbell row is an excellent exercise for working out your back muscles.
Tips for correct posture and movement:
1. Position yourself sideways in front of a mirror.
2. Lean over and rest your left knee gently on bench.
3. Brace yourself with your left hand and bend over.
4. Your right knee should be slightly bent, back flat, and neck relaxed. (Check the mirror)
5. Grab the weight from the floor and isolating just your back muscles, squeeze and lift the weight until your upper arm is parallel to your back while exhaling.
6. Maintaining control and as you breathe in, allow the weight to drop down until your arm is extended but not hyperextended (do not let weight touch the floor).
7. Repeat for 7-10 reps and switch sides. Do a lighter set to start off with and then 3 sets on each side.
Nice work! Combine this with the close-grip pulldowns demonstrated earlier, add wide-grip pulldowns (be very careful to relax your neck and do not extend neck forward) and you now have a solid 3 exercises to start to sculpt your back muscles.
Nov
21
2010
As we approach Thanksgiving, take a few moments in some quiet time alone to just . . . be . . . thankful.
A few months ago, I started to say thanks every morning when I woke up and every evening before I drifted off. It has become a wonderful habit that I look forward to and it has changed my life.
It seems to calm and center me and put everything in perspective and get back to seeing the big picture and appreciating the little things – the beauty in day to day life and interactions with beautiful human beings.
So, when you get some time, take a few moments and:
- Give some thought to what you are thankful for – right here, right now.
- Write it down. Commit.
- Say it out loud. Your voice gives it power.
- Share it with the special people who are on the list. It may just make/save their day.
- Make it a habit. Why not.
To you, I am thankful.
With warmest aloha,
Kass
Oct
19
2010
How to figure out what you want . . . sometimes by figuring out what you don’t.
I recently came across an exchange I had with a friend of mine and thought you would appreciate.
In response to my email, he sent this reply: “Do you really believe what you said : ‘You’re quite an impressive man and have created quite a dream life. You deserve it!’. That is a very nice compliment, thank you. I don’t really feel it this way and I m wandering myself sometime what my life looks like and what is my purpose…. But it is a nice compliment 
”
My reply: Yes, I do and I do not say things or feel them lightly. Everyone deserves the best life offers. Many never try. Often times one figures out what they want by testing everything they don’t want and that allows a person to truly figure out and appreciate who they are and who they are becoming. That was my path . . . still is. Yours may be different. Whatever works.
Perhaps you have always lived your life the way you do and as such, have no other point of reference and have been surrounded by those with lifestyles like yours.
It’s not just about how everything looks on the outside – location, material possessions, hobbies, appearance but shows through in the way one carries and conducts oneself, how they treat others, their sense of self, spirituality, respect, a healthy blend of humility and self-confidence, lifestyle, convictions, values.
It’s taken me a long time to accept and really believe this but I think one’s purpose is to be good, loving, share your special talents and gifts, and continue doing what you’re doing with an awareness and acceptance that if something doesn’t work, change it or move on. Life is too short.
Once you let go of all the other expectations of yourself and others, it’s very freeing and interestingly this then seems to lead to more purpose, connection, love, peace, money, and joy. One can live in the now but still be continually creating and adjusting a future that more and more allows them to remember and be who they really are – a good, peaceful, loving, gifted and giving soul. I do believe we are all together in this together. Appreciate-Embrace-Enjoy.
Oct
17
2010
When is the last time someone asked you (or you asked yourself) “What do you want?” It seems that a crucial step in developing balance is to start with what YOU truly desire. This is a simple yet powerful exercise.
Often, one dis-covers that they tend to automatically parrot their own or someone else’s idea of what life “should” be like and what constitutes balance.
However, each person comes from a unique set of experiences and may have a radically different idea of what he or she wants in terms of work, lifestyle, money, family, friends, and activities.
Many people find it difficult to articulate their desires. Say something! You have to start somewhere. It doesn’t matter that they may change. They probably will and that’s ok.
It might help to think of it as part of the process – awareness and acknowledgment of your gift as a human being to think, learn, feel, and dream! As you test yourself, you will begin to shape your ideal day and start to live the way you have always dreamed. It may take a lifetime but it will be worth it.
If you begin a quest for balance without your foundation, you’re likely to end up more off-balance and frustrated than when you began. Toss in a hefty dose of guilt and you’re just wasting time and energy. So be bold, be daring, and ask yourself “What do I want?”
Thanks for taking the time to ride along
Wishing you life, love, and laughter… all day long!
Oct
12
2010
How can I control my temper? Read on for some tips on how to control your temper, temper, TEMPER!
Teeth clenched, nostrils flaring, heart pounding, blood boiling. You get the picture. Anger is a strong, powerful, seductive, and energizing emotion. Volumes have been written on what triggers anger and how to manage it. A study by psychologist Tice found (not surprisingly) that “Anger is the mood people are worst at controlling.” (Daniel Goldman Emotional Intelligence)
Tell that to your boss, spouse, or friend who is on the receiving end of your tirade and you might not get a ton of sympathy for your case. They may reply in Ben Franklin’s words Anger is never without a reason, but seldom a good one.” That will calm you down! Touché.
Understanding and acknowledging your own anger and what sets it off can prepare you the next time emotion strikes and help you retrain and rewire your stimulus-response system. Here are some proven techniques to get you started.
- Remove yourself from the situation: Walk it off, take a drive, keep your mouth shut.
- Reduce the arousal: Stop, breathe deeply, bite your tongue, close your eyes.
- Express your emotions: For example, “I’m feeling very angry and highly annoyed right now. I’d like to calm down and discuss this later.”
- Release the energy: Punch a pillow, crank up the music and dance, kick something (preferably not the bedroom door)
- Get physical: Lift, bike, run. Monitor your behavior and find something that works for you.
The point is to use the energy of anger to work for you instead of against you. It’s quite telling to determine what ticks you off. Over time, if anger is not addressed and released, it will manifest itself in dis-ease, unhealthy relationships, alcohol or drug abuse, denial, and the list goes on and on. If you do snap at someone, own it.
Offer an apology and feel free to explain your emotions neglected to consult with your logic. Chances are that you’ll be met with a blank stare which may prompt you to develop new patterns even more quickly to avoid such outburst and explanations in the future.
Time’s a Tickin’: “Time is not my enemy… my choices are my enemy.” (Reverend Douglas Finch) Take it one step further, focus on the positives, and your choices can be your best friend. In every moment, we have the opportunity to change the course of our day, year, life. What decisions will you make today? Time is not your enemy. Simple, succinct, seductive… enough said.
Thanks for taking the time to ride along
Wishing you life, love, and laughter… all day long!
Oct
12
2010
Close Grip Pull Down
- Start out with a light warm up set of 8-12 reps
- Focus on squeezing both sides of your back together along your spine
- Do 2-3 sets at a weight where you can only do a max of 7-8 reps
Lat Pull Down (Side View)
Aug
19
2010
What are 8 keys to keep it in perspective? Lighten it up. It’s all good. Shake it off. Remember the song stanza “It won’t mean a thing in a hundred years.” When the trials of life stare you in the face, try a tag line. They’ve become popular for a reason. A simple snap of awareness can redirect your attention, energy, and communication.
That’s not to say that some issues don’t deserve your serious time and attention. It’s more about picking your priorities and giving yourself (and the folks around you rolling their eyes) a break. All of that other “stuff” can consume you, weigh you down, and hopefully prompt you to ponder “In the whole scope of things, is it really that big of a deal?” It’s probably not.
The simple fact that we number 1 in 6+ billion people in this world can do wonders for your crisis-driven, overly egocentric mind. Getting over yourself can free you to give back and leave something behind that will make a difference 100, 1000 years from now. Think collectively. Change your response, change your life, and change the world. A few tips and techniques to lighten it up.
- Think of the way people in other cultures and countries live every day and count your blessings.
- Incorporate “whatever” into your lingo and when the cookie crumbles and the milk spills, throw out a “whatever”, grab a spoon, and lap it up!
- When others push your buttons, smile and say “Maybe you’re right. Interesting point.” Or simply say “Excuse me” and walk away.
- Open all of the windows and shades and let the light shine in.
- Shed a layer or clothing and let your skin breathe!
- Wear bright colored clothes at least four times a week.
- Skip, yep skip like a kid, preferably in public but the privacy of your home is excellent training ground as well.
- Clear your calendar. Say no to everything and everyone for a week, a month. Wow, what might you do with all of that free time?
- BONUS: Go climb a hill, mountain, tree, building. Literally rise above the noise and the hassle. Capture that feeling, bring it down with you, and call it back the next time you’re tested.
Then, give yourself a break and take your own best advice – Lighten up and keep it in perspective.
Express Yourself: Give this one a try – do the wave! Perfect opportunity with horns blaring, people swearing, tensions flaring. Hold back that flying finger and flip ‘em a wave instead. They may think they know you. They may actually know you. Add a smile and watch out!
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